Reconciling feelings & emotions & just dealing with living!

Posted on May 4, 2009

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I think that it is interesting to say the least, that the feeling I get from some certain folks is that I should forgive and forget. Move on and pretend that would I went through didn’t happen. Easier said than done my friends. I only wish I could. I put it away, I don’t dwell on it day to day, but to forget it isn’t possible. Because you see I am dealing w/ is the after effects. Although the horrible is done, it’s the feelings of what was done that remains. In order to do what he did to me he had to whittle away at my self worth. I grew up thinking that I wasn’t worthy of anything, he did that and now I have to reconcile the fact that the person that made feel sub-human is the person that my mom chooses to live with. To this day she remains married to the one person that made her daughter feel like less than a person. She seems okay w/ that, she seems okay to not have a relationship w/ me but one w/ him. I will never feel okay w/ that.

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